We are getting more and more contributions from followers of this website and we are very grateful for all the lovely comments too. This very personal blog came from Andrea.
I have just read your story & I'm in bits.
I do not know where to begin; I can completely relate to your childhood as mine was very similar. However, I don't have a sister; she died at a few days old. My Mum wore dresses, though and by the time I was twelve, they fitted me, my Mum being only 4'10'' tall.
Life, before I started to transition, was a nightmare. I hated the world & most people in it. I could never stand football, cricket etc. and if some macho football head started talking about some 'balls' sport to me in a pub, they'd get ' Don't know, don't care, not interested.'
"But you're a guy. You gotta love football'' - 'No, I don't now piss off. '
I'm almost 5'6'' & lightweight. However, if they got a little nasty, their face invariably made rapid contact with the bar or my foot. I ended up with a bit of a reputation as someone you don't mess with or talk about ball sports to.
I grew up in Blackley Village, North Manchester. My Dad was an ex-Royal Navy Telegraphist and my Mum a cook; I have one little brother Pete, who I love dearly. However, since I told Pete I'm trans about two years ago, I've heard nothing from him, not even a text message on my birthday.
My Dad died in December 2015 & my Mum died in Aug 2016 from, I believe, a broken heart.
My Mum knew I was trans, probably before I knew what trans was.
My Dad probably knew too, as my Mum would have explained that I am different from other 'boys'. I only wish I had become the real me before they died.
I have a few friends, although I know many people and I get on with everybody, even the football 'eads as that a 'mans' game & they don't (thankfully) talk to women about man stuff. Nowadays, they just buy me a drink, or three, and try to chat me up.
I like the gorgeous Steph, look!
Whilst writing this little excerpt from my life, I have been in tears.
My life, as a whole, has been an emotional nightmare. Hating my body, hating just about everything people related. There is no substitute for reality & as a woman, I am real, I feel real, I am finally free from the nightmare of life, I'm free to be me.
So long as the NHS & Government pull their bloody finger out of their ass & get rid of this unnecessary gatekeeping bull shit.
Trans people know they are trans.
We have known ALL of our lives; we do NOT need some theory educated psychological asshole to determine our gender for us.
I am a f'kin woman; get used to it or go rot in a tree stump.
I am so fed up with reading about trans taking their own lives or being attacked, mutilated or killed it breaks my heart. If a woman goes to the ladies, what business is it of some obnoxious mouthy individuals what sex they were assigned at birth!
It's the brain that makes the woman, not the hated body.
Obnoxious idiots do not have the right to abuse, assault, mutilate or kill a trans person. I wish they would get it into their football infused minds that it is perfectly legal for a trans woman to use the ladies & for a trans man to use the gent's toilets.
But back to me.
I live on my own, in Bolton Lancashire - not in Greater Manchester, which is also in Lancashire. I rarely get visitors, although I don't often feel lonely. I watch old movies, as long as the English aren't too received Ie laaaarhst, paaaahrt, agaaaahrst, drives me nuts that snobby crap..
I'm often to be found on my Xbox One X (Andrea B 65). Either playing Fallout 4, Snowrunner or finding beneficial trans-related stuff, which I am passing on to Steph to post in the read this stuff section or whatever it's called.
If ever you're fed up, peed off or feeling very alone and you have a Microsoft account come say Hi …I don't bite, Andrea B 65, or ask Steph for my email as I'm not sure if I can put it here.
I keep having this question rattling around in my head, why was I born with the wrong body? It drives me nuts not knowing the answer. Prenatal hormones? Genetics? Not a clue, I got no answers to that one.
Motorcycles, I love 'em!
I can ride them, strip & rebuild them, tune them to go faster than the designer intended. Come October, I will be back on the road as I'll have enough money to buy a replacement for my ER 500, which was stolen & my VN 'Billy' Easy Rider custom which got torched cos I'm trans.
I may add more to this blog in the future - who knows?