Last night I was in conversation on Twitter with two of my closest Twitter followers - both lovely women who I have talked to on the phone, neither transgender. We were discussing if sex should be recorded on a birth certificate. I like so many trans people, think it should not. We are driven to this suggestion because it is so damn difficult in the UK to update our birth certificates - a legal and human right. Now to be clear, I am not talking about biology - I am talking law.
My two followers, though, did not agree. 99% of us are happy mooted one. And she was, of course, right - why should 99% of people who are happy change an age-old tradition for just 1% of unhappy people.
And then I started to think about all the fuss GRA reform is causing.
The toxic gender war, probably tens of thousands of working hours in parliament just discussing it, not counting the many thousands more by gender-crits and trans activists. And the cost to the public purse? Many hundreds of millions of pounds. Money that could - no should - be spent on deserving issues like helping impoverished families on universal credit, for example. Or helping women who are victims of domestic abuse - something so common, that it is barely discussed.
And all this fuss for what?
A change on a tiny minority of birth certificates - that sees the light of day perhaps half a dozen times in a lifetime. Oh yes, and for a few - different pension rights. That's it. Nothing else - except one thing. The human right to die in the sex and gender I and others like me choose.
Because I can and do live as a woman.
I look like a woman, sound like a woman have photographic ID that confirms I am a woman - both my passport and driving licence (both legal documents) says "F." And to be honest, it was all very easy. The driving licence change took three weeks if I recall correctly. And the passport just eleven working days. If I am asked for official photographic ID - I have it in my purse.
It is incredibly unlikely I will be asked for anything more.
So what's my problem? I just can't die as a woman.
Well, I can, if I prostitute myself and apply for a Gender Recognition Certificate - which I will not - because I refuse to bow to a demonstrably cruel, unjust, bureaucratic procedure that I actively campaign against and will continue to campaign against.
So I (and others) are caught; we can live - but can't die a proper death.
Crazy, but true.